My Artist Story - Face the Fear

Sometimes a menial task like taking a shower can boost your creativity. I wanted to craft my story a bit better on my blog. And unintentionally, the words just formed and in the right order. I knew that this is what I wanted to tell. Sharing on here for those interested. =)  

For as long as I can remember, I’ve been obsessed about art. Ever since my mom enrolled me in a drawing workshop as a 5 year old at The Newark Museum, I can still remember how proud I was to show her my still life sketch of an egg, beaming ear to ear as the instructor praised my rendering of the object. I especially loved to illustrate people and houses, so much so that when I discovered what an architect does, I thought for sure I’d make a career designing houses.

Somehow, between growing up and making choices, I had made the common mistake of listening to the many adults in my life who convinced me to pursue a law degree, due to my academic honors and promising career as a nationally competitive debater. I took their advice, putting my first love on hold, and my artist child shrunk in the distance. By senior year in college, I had an honors thesis complete, a hefty LSAT score under my belt, and an increasingly haunting fear that I would never realize my dream of becoming a full-time artist.

Now four years later, after climbing the hurdles of self-doubt and artist block, I quit my corporate job in Manhattan and I strive to nurture the artist child within. I wouldn’t dare let another day go by without thinking about my art. Like before, I paint houses, beautiful scenes, and, yes, even eggs! Daily painting for me is an affirmation of my soul and my serenity.

Peace and painting,

Amira Rahim

“Every child is an artist. The problem is how to remain an artist once we grow up.” - Picasso

Random Thoughts/Affirmations

"Birch Trees" - Watercolor study on paper
"Birch Trees" - Watercolor study on paper

You know, I'm realizing more and more that sometimes we don't give ourselves enough credit.

I was talking to a friend of mine the other day, when she said something that I know logically, but neglect to keep it in mind these days and that is that: Art is subjective.

Three words. One truth. A very simple truth. Spoken from one creative mind to another. And yet, it is so profound in these crucial days of my artist journey.

I am about to embark on a new path. A shift in thinking about my work and my goals. A dive into reality, while merging a bridge between my passion of painting and my needs as any other artist/creative.

Most prolific is my need to share the beauty I see everyday--tiny people against tall buildings, the way the light hits a collection of bell peppers from the grocery store--and attempt to capture that in my work.

This need to share can only be enhanced through discipline, endurance, and hopefully, pronounced acceptance by my viewers, old and new to come, hopefully manifesting in the form of purchases. After all, art is an expensive hobby.

So, art is subjective.

And yet I am stifled by my very normal, but very loud, fears of producing "wrong art."

After years of defining my intelligence through numbers and grades, it's hard to shift into my right brain not just on the canvas, but in my being, in my right to exist.

There is no monopoly on beauty, expression, charm. Why then do I fear there's this monopoly on art?

So, here are some affirmations. I wish I could say they were daily but life is full of inconsistencies:

  • First things first, I am a painter. I have been painting since the age of 14. Ten years later and with few classes in between, I am a very good painter. I didn't get worse. Contrary to the bad voices in my head.
  • I have an eye for good art. This helps me in evaluating my own work, often times, too critically. Bottom line: I know when something sucks. I know when something can use more work. And I know when something's genius.
  • I have a good sense of color. I love color. I dream in color.
  • I can draw like nobody's business, which translates into better, more accurate compositions when I paint.
  • I am incredibly self-effacing and I ought not to be.
  • I am a really fast learner.
  • I can do this. And dammit, I will.

I've been so worried about getting it wrong, when all along, there's more than one way to get it right.

And it's okay to be awesome.

"Friday Prayer" - Watercolor on paper (2013)
"Friday Prayer" - Watercolor on paper (2013)

unblocking

hello. whoever's reading this. visitor. friend. love.

i've been a bit preocuppied with my own preoccupations of self, talent, and purpose. i'm reading "The Artist's Way" to help facilitate this process. and as the author explains:

ultimately, recovering from being a shadow artist and attempting to unblock myself.

no, seriously. this week was a combination of watercolor victories (or fails), followed by sleepless nights crawling from my bed to the living room for impromptu studies of form, color, and composition. it's that serious.

i've managed to push out some paint onto a few canvases this week. here's what i came up with.

go like my facebook page  for support. i'm only getting warmed up!

 

photo (5) photo (4)